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TUSTIN, CA — A powerful movement of the Holy Spirit was felt in the souls of a pair of believers this past week, as a local couple felt led to join a church with free childcare, a movie theater, and a day spa.

The couple had told family and friends that they were considering finding a new church to attend a few weeks prior, before later tearfully testifying that they felt a strong, irresistible draw to join Abundant River of Living Water, which just so happens to feature a state-of-the-art kids ministry and daycare, a sweet theater, and an all-inclusive spa.

“The Lord obviously wants us here,” said Nathan Stark. “We wanted to find a church where we could really be fed spiritually and use our own gifts to serve the needs of the body. Also, the day spa, theater, and free childcare are pretty cool. And have you seen the coffee bar? So good. But, yeah, this was totally the Holy Spirit’s leading.”

Nathan’s wife, Vanessa, agreed. “There’s no denying it,” she said. “We came to visit, saw all the amazing things they have to offer, and we knew this was the place for us. Spiritually, that is. I mean, who are we to kick against the goads? You just can’t keep living your life resisting the Holy Spirit.”

At publishing time, the Starks had joined with the rest of the congregation to pray fervently about a new proposal to add organic avocado toast to the church’s weekly service budget.

World, meet Travis. Travis, meet the world. In this first episode of our new show Travis Interviews the World, we interview some guy named Jordan Peterson.


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