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SPRINGFIELD, MO — A local man faced a crisis of faith this week, as friends revealed he was struggling to understand how God could let good things happen to bad people like him.

Kevin Lofton had just received news that he was being offered a promotion and a raise at his job, despite the fact that he knew himself to be a depraved sinner who relied solely on the grace of God to prevent him from facing the consequences of his sin.

“Why, O Lord? Why do you allow these things to happen?” Lofton was heard asking after hearing the exciting news. “If you really are an all-powerful God, how do you let such wonderful things happen to sinful wretches like me? It tests the boundaries of my faith.”

Lofton’s family and close friends detailed his struggle. “It’s been a stumbling block for him for a long time,” said his lovely wife, Kristin, another blessing he did not deserve. “It’s definitely caused him to question God every now and then. He keeps wondering, ‘If God is so holy, how can he allow such a wicked man to receive good things?'”

When reached for comment, Lofton again stressed his undeservedness. “Woe is me!” he exclaimed. “Who am I that God should be kind to me? Make it make sense.”

At publishing time, Lofton was last seen celebrating by sitting in sackcloth with ashes on his head after hearing the wonderful news that his wife was pregnant with a fifth child.

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