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It’s not the holiday season without heartwarming stories of love, redemption… and a father faking his death to flee to Europe.

This is Ryan Borgwardt, a 45-year-old man from Watertown, Wisconsin. You might remember him from this story we published a few weeks back:

This adventure began on August 12th when Ryan vanished while kayaking in Green Lake, Wisconsin. Authorities searched for 54 days, spending nearly $40,000 in the process, assuming he’d drown in the lake. But it turns out that Ryan wasn’t at the bottom of the lake! He was basically living out a weird Eastern European spy thriller fantasy in Europe.

“Great news, we know that he’s alive and well,” said Green Lake County Sheriff Mark Podoll in a press conference. “And, well, the bad news is that we don’t know where Ryan exactly is, and he has not decided to return home.”

Ryan has been in touch with investigators via email and even sent a video to prove he’s alive. In the clip, he casually says, “I’m in my apartment. I am safe, secure.”

The case was cracked back in early October, with investigators discovering that he had staged his August kayak flipping, paddled to shore in what was described as a child-size inflatable boat, and hopped on an e-bike to a bus station. From there, it was Detroit to Canada to a plane bound for Europe. And all this while syncing his laptop to the cloud, replacing his hard-drive and scrubbing his search history.

What are the chances “how do you fake your death” was a recent search?

Then there’s the $375,000 life insurance policy he conveniently took out in January, the foreign bank account, and the airline cards. Oh, and a mysterious woman in Uzbekistan.

Now, police are trying to persuade Ryan to return home to his devastated family.

“Christmas is coming, and what better gift he could give his kids is to be there for Christmas with them,” Podell said.

Because nothing says holiday cheer like Dad flying home after faking his death and fleeing the country for a months-long bender in Uzbekistan.

Follow Ian on Substack or X (@ighaworth).

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