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I mean, what a week. It has surpassed even my wildest, most grand expectations. Frankly, I don’t want it to end.
Sometimes, you get to a Friday and you’re THRILLED. You just need it to be over. OK, that’s 99% of the time. But not today. Not this Friday. Not this week.
This week has been an absolute all-timer. We may never, ever experience one like it again. Donald Trump wiping the floor with the Democrats on Tuesday has literally just broken them. It’s amazing. The fallout from a second Trump term has been incredible.
CNN is broken and hanging on by a thread. Rachel Maddow is lost. There’s something called a 4B movement going on right now on TikTok where angry liberal women are just abstaining from sex for the foreseeable future. Another liberal hack on Twitter doubled down just this morning and called Trump Hitler.
A disheveled Kathy Griffin emerged this morning with a four-minute video full of some of the most scorching hot takes you’ll ever hear. Michael Cohen is trying to flee the country, but the internet keeps putting turkeys on his head (you’ll see).
It’s amazing. The #content has been flowing so fast and furious, I haven’t been able to keep up. And just when I think it’s gonna slow down and I’ll be able to get back to sports, BAM – another meltdown on network TV. What a week.
On that note, welcome to a Friday Nightcaps – the one where we honor our great military veterans with the Hooters girls.
What else? I’ve got AT&T Lily needing a break after the country looked a little too much like a Verizon map on Tuesday, the best of the rest from a big week of #content (as if there’s enough time in the day to get it all), the NFL was once again rigged last night, and how about this new Tulane women’s basketball coach?
She’s all in on Kamala Harris! Still. Respect.
Grab you a Harvey Wallbanger to celebrate National Harvey Wallbangers Day, and settle in for an end-of-the-week ‘Cap!
Speaking of banging heads on walls!
Y’all ever had/heard of a Harvey Wallbanger? I assume so, right? If not … Google tells me it’s a fruity and spirited cocktail made with 3 parts vodka, 1 part Galliano and 6 parts orange juice.
I don’t wanna get into the backstory too much because it’s a Friday and we have places to be, but just know that it involves a surfer, a bartender, and a whole mess of screwdrivers.
There was also a cartoon character created back in the day called Harvey Wallbanger with the slogan, “Harvey Wallbanger’s the name, and I can be made.” And get this! Harvey received the most write-in votes EVER in the 1972 presidential election, which was eventually won by Richard Nixon.
And if you thought Tuesday was a landslide for Trump, go back and check out the results from ’72.
OK, whew. What a history lesson! Anyway, here’s a very defeated AT&T Lily declaring that she’s leaving Instagram for a while after the country looked more like a Verizon map this week:
What a week of #content
Sad. Gonna miss AT&T Lily. She’s given us a great run of content since last spring, but all good things must come to an end. Oh well. She’ll be back. I know she will. One day.
OK, let’s move on because if AT&T Lily ain’t with us, then we don’t need her! We have plenty of other things to occupy us for the time being, like the greatest week of internet #content in the history time. I’m serious.
The unhinged takes, the panicking, the in-fighting over at CNN … it’s been a Hall of Fame week over on Elon’s Twitter. We’re gonna tell our kids about it someday.
Let’s cherry-pick a couple winners as we head into the weekend:
(This one cut me deep because I gave out Dionate Johnson over 17.5 receiving yards yesterday and this one pass would’ve hit it. I’ll never bet him again. Loser.)
Tulane, Hooters & another banner night for the NFL
Couple things …
1. I could watch that Michael Cohen video all day. In fact, I have. It’s funny every single time. Every time.
2. Things are going well over at CNN I see.
3. The NFL is rigged, right? Like, at this point, it’s hard for me to argue it. The penalties this year – or lack thereof – specifically on Thursday Night Football, have been so insane it’s ridiculous.
We finally got a good TNF game, and it was once again marred in controversy because A) the officials missed a facemask (AGAIN!), and B) Mike Gesicki got assaulted on 4th down and literally nobody said a thing. I’ve never seen such a blatant defensive hold in my life.
It’s sickening. Forget dismantling the Deep State, let’s start with referee reform in the NFL, Trump! Make Referees Invisible Again!
OK, couple quickies as we rapid-fire this bad boy into a big weekend. First up? Let’s check in on new Tulane women’s basketball coach, Ashley Langford!
Hilarious. I also don’t get it? I mean, if Kamala had won, I’d be annoyed, but I’d certainly understand. Lord knows I’ve been taking Victory Laps all week.
But she lost … does Ashley know she lost? Serious question. What did Prime say?
You look good u feel good, u feel good u play good, u play good they pay good, they pay good u live good, u live good u thank God 4 it all!
Tulane lost.
PS: If you’re in the NOLA area ever, there’s a great public golf course right outside the city with Tulane in the background when you make the turn. It’s sick.
Finally, on the way out, let’s all remember that we have Veterans Day this coming Monday. Let’s show them the respect they deserve, and let’s start right now.
Have a big weekend everyone. And God Bless the US of A.
OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).
You tired of winning yet? Be honest. Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.