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Holy smokes.

I can hardly wait.

And yet it’s like I don’t want even to see it either. 

The wait is going to be so excruciating.

But I’ll be here on the couch, live-blogging with the rest of the crew. Dr. Alice has to bring twice as much pizza as usual because Ebola is home from England, and he eats like he was still 12 years old. major dad has to work Wednesday, so I don’t anticipate him being awake on the couch with me at 3 a.m. like he was the night…well, morning…I got home from our GOP Victory party in 2016.

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He was glued to the tube, watching MSNBC types melt down.

He still watches it sometimes. It simply makes one happy.

We hope to have such an evening for the country’s sake. For everyone’s sake.

I want them all to look like a steaming witch in the corner who just got doused with a bucket of water.

But, like I said, we’ll all be on the couch like most of you, I guess – whatever the outcome.

So I’d have to believe the plywood going up in Washington D.C., protecting storefronts and entries, isn’t in anticipation of HotAir members charging downtown in red hats after a couple of martinis. 

David said several cities have got the National Guard on standby.

I’ll lay you money they’re worried about the usual suspects, right?

You know – Republicans.

It seems they’re really sweating MAGA types jumping the White House fence, and isn’t that weird.

No one was at all worried when Trump lived there.

I guess that’s another (D)ifference.

In all seriousness, MAGA and right-wing extremists are known to be a problem in the Pacific Northwest. It is a veritable hotbed of white toxic masculinity.

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Portland takes MAGA very seriously.

Scraggly beards, torn flannels, watch caps, needles, rolling papers, etc. – all the insurrectiony type hallmarks wander the streets with impunity there.

Get those boards up, stat.

Gracious, look – Los Angeles, too! Knock me over with a feather.

What a pity. Look what they’re covering up.

I’ve heard that weak and simple-minded conservative women really love looted Coach purses (MAGA’s not so big on Footlocker, and Carhartt stores usually aren’t in the same neighborhood). I sure hope someone can get that wood off the front so redneck Candy from Conecuh isn’t disappointed while celebrating, win or lose.

Seems like they can’t get the boards up fast enough all over the country.

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Well, you all be careful out there and don’t catch any splinters in awkward places. They can be a bitch to get out.

Like I said, boring and well-behaved as we are – plus I have to work – we’ll be safe and behaving here on the couch. 

Unlike those incompetently run blue hellholes…well. I could rephrase.

Unlike anything that has had a Democratic administration for decades upon decades and is mired in everyday misery, we live in Florida.

We don’t allow that sort of nonsense in these here parts.

We also prefer to purchase our purses from stores with glass in the windows.

We are so different from the opposition. It never ceases to amaze me.

Night and day.

It makes you wonder if the plywood is really some liberal city Magic 8 Ball. They fully anticipate peaceful Lefty tears and fiery tantrums should Trump take the brass ring.

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If Trump wins, stay as far away from downtown as possible.  

My team has already been told if Trump wins, we must all work from home for our safety. 

#Portland #PortlandRiots

Lemme give it a shake and a spin…and I’ll take that as a yes.

Say your prayers and make sure you’ve done your part.

See you tomorrow.

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT