Tim Walz’s Wife Says Putting Tampons In All Bathrooms Could Help Kids Read (I’d Say Books Are A Better Option)

Democrat Vice Presidential Candidate Tim Walz‘s wife, Gwen Walz, did what she had to do when asked to defend her husband’s notoriously kooky law to put free menstrual products in all school restrooms ‚— including boys’ rooms — with an answer so hilariously out there, you have to respect the effort.

She said that having those tampons in there could help kids learn to read better…

I think maybe giving them some Goosebumps books or even a magazine might be a better approach to make them better readers, but let’s hear what Gwen has to say.

Walz was doing an interview with Katie Couric, when, according to Fox News Digital, she was asked about her husband’s notorious nickname “Tampon Tim” which stemmed from that piece of legislation that puts tampons in boys’ bathrooms.

First of all, I’ve got to assume no wife ever wants to defend their husband for being called “Tampon Tim.” I bet you Gwen would prefer almost any other nickname you could throw at him. “Tall-Tale Tim,” “Red Tim,” hell, even “Halitosis Tim” would be a step up.

Secondly, I kind of hate when candidates’ significant others are asked to defend policy decisions made by their husbands or wives. They didn’t make them, and they’re not the ones trying to get into office. 

It’d be like if someone asked my girlfriend to defend why my fantasy football team sucks. 

But anyway, Couric asked, and this is what Mrs. Walz said:

“If kids are hungry in school, what that does to the brain and learning, you’re not going to learn to read,” she explained. “So if you’re talking about learning to read and closing gaps then you better take away the barriers for that. If that’s tampons, then that’s tampons, right?”

Hey, that’s an insane answer, but she’s being asked to defend an insane position, so that’s about as good as you’re going to do.

Gwen Walz defended her husband’s policy of putting tampons in all school bathrooms — including the boys’ room — by saying it could help kids learn to read. (Getty Images)

I like to think I’m a pretty good reader, but, man, by Mrs. Walz’s logic, I’d be on my third reading of Finnegans Wake if my high school had just thrown a handful of tampons in the boys’ bathroom for no reason.

“Take away the barriers and let’s get to the real work of this, not get lost in what are components and, as some people would say, you know, equaling the playing field or whatever it might be,” she said. 

That last part may have been boiler-plate gobbledygook, but again, my high school didn’t have tampons in the boys’ bathroom, so maybe it just flew over my head.

It’s such an out of nowhere explanation, for a ludicrous bit of policy, that, in a way, I respect the creativity and the way Walz was on her toes for that question.