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A long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, a young boy sits in his room. The force sensitive son of a Sith Lord, he is the greatest hope to free the galaxy from the oppressive tyranny of The Empire. However, the boy never meets Obi-wan Kenobi. Never begins his Jedi training. Yoda dies alone in the swampy isolation on Dagobah. The Rebel Alliance is doomed to fail. That boy misses his destiny all because he just can’t stop feeding quarters into the nut punching machine. 

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This would have been the fate to befall the galaxy had Tatooine had X.

Mark Hamill just can’t help himself. Quarter after quarter. Punch after punch. He just never learns and keeps feeding that machine!

He does realize that Kamala Harris is currently the Vice President? He has to right?

That would make sense. What was in that blue milk anyway? A big dose of galactic acid would explain a lot!

Mark is obviously unburdened by what has been, what is, and what will be. The blue milk being Hallucinogenic really seems like the likely answer here!

Okay. Maybe it’s not the blue milk. Maybe it’s not the meds he’s on but the meds he’s not on. We could be on to something here!

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Yes! It’s Occam’s razor. It’s always Occam’s razor. The answer isn’t over medication, under medication, or LSD laced space milk! He’s most likely just a big old dummy! BINGO!

Well, in this theoretical galaxy, Mark watched Kamala forever become Darth Plagiarist when she threw Emperor Biden into the reactor shaft of the Democrat’s Death Star and he saw the good in her. He searched his delusional feelings and knew that she was not just a Sith Lord, she was HIS Sith Lord! It’s probably better that Yoda didn’t live to see this.