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There are politicians who believe, earnestly, that there isn’t an aspect of your life they shouldn’t have control over or knowledge of. We’re kind of surprised some governmental body hasn’t demanded reporting on how frequently we use the bathroom under the guise of ‘water conservation’ or ‘public health awareness’, but we’re sure it’s coming.

And these policies always take the place of addressing actual issues — like crime, the economy, or immigration — because it’s much easier to crack down on the already law abiding than it is to go after the outlaws or complex issues.

A prime example of this: In the UK, starting on Tuesday, citizens will be required to register ‘kept birds’ with the government or face fines. Even one chicken.

In Britain from next Tuesday it will be a criminal offence to keep a chicken without registering it with the authorities. Clown country 🤡🇬🇧https://t.co/vdV6FkUSMw

— Douglas Carswell🇬🇧🇺🇸 (@DouglasCarswell) September 27, 2024

Given how ruthlessly authorities enforce hate speech laws versus laws against rape, they’ll probably crack down on the clandestine fowl keepers hard.

The Telegraph reports:

Let me take an example whose sheer triviality is telling. I have before me the new “Kept Bird Registration Form – Keeper of less [shouldn’t it be ‘fewer’?] than 50 Poultry or Other Captive Birds”. This four-page document insists that you give the address of where the birds are kept, their “Country Parish Holding (CPH) number”, map references, your own details and the number of birds, their species, such as chickens, ducks, ostriches, psittacines and cassowaries, and the purposes for which you keep them, eg. releasing for racing, display, “growing pullets up to point of lay”. Even if you have but one solitary hen, “you are breaking the law if you do not register”, which you must do by Tuesday. 

It is argued that registration is made necessary by recent bird flu. Serious though bird flu has recently been, it seems reasonable to believe that this extension of the criminal law is excessive, and more than reasonable to believe that, in a country where goodness knows how many people keep a few chickens, ducks or geese, enforcement will be preposterously expensive.

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This is what government does best: pass asinine laws that are insanely expensive and difficult to enforce.

But it’s ok to cut an animals throat for ‘Halal’ slaughter?

— Evermore (@PlanFluor) September 27, 2024

They can’t discriminate against that culture. That would be racist, or something.

Very similar to Poland. I was in Montenegro this summer and talked to a polish man who said the rural areas (still very traditional) were being decimated by laws surrounding the traditional keeping of animals
This is not random. It is an effort to control where we get food. They…

— MummyisTired (@MummyisT) September 28, 2024

Having a list of people who have chickens — and therefore eggs and meat — sure seems like setting the stage for confiscation of those things down the road, no?

What if this chicken just one day….appears in my lawn area….like a migrant chicken?

— Apheleia (@Apheleia9) September 28, 2024

It will qualify for asylum and public benefits.

It’s never been more apparent that we are not a free people.

— WinningWithLewis (@Lewmedge) September 28, 2024

From ‘keep calm and carry on’ to ‘register your chickens’ in a few generations.

They want to use the Chinese model to control us.

Control food & you control people.https://t.co/RJiCHhh5X6 pic.twitter.com/u85RxOMCje

— Herbthefox (@herbthefox1) September 28, 2024

You sure do.

Communism. https://t.co/thNgm5YKu8

— Matthew Marsden (@matthewdmarsden) September 28, 2024

‘We see you have six chickens. Your neighbor has two. We are confiscating your chickens in the name of equity.’

Buy chickens.

And then. Do nothing.

Stop obeying the rules https://t.co/yvBq8Ma3h7

— Citizen X (@Citizen23259866) September 27, 2024

Civil disobedience.

Not to put too fine a point on it. I recommend anyone concerned by this action begin breeding quail in cages in their basement, garage, a spare room, or an outdoor shed.

They are small, quiet, live well in confined spaces, produce copious (if small) eggs and reproduce quickly. https://t.co/5ICpebrifx

— CowLivesMatter (@ProtesterLone) September 28, 2024

Become ungovernable.