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SAN FRANCISCO, CA — Looking for authentic sushi at a reasonable price? Look elsewhere. Bushido Sushi may look the part, but be warned: it’s run by a white dude.

Located at the intersection of Washington and Cherry in the luxurious Presidio Heights, Bushido Sushi opened to rave reviews until the local clientele discovered it was managed by a white dude named Steve Johnson.

“I’m always on the lookout for good sushi, but the white dude cutting tuna behind the counter was a bad sign,” read just one of several one-star Yelp reviews. “I wish I could give it zero stars but Yelp must be run by a white dude too.”

Bushido Sushi promoted itself as accessible sushi with a refined touch. Diners reported its menu to be expansive, featuring such rare items as otoro and caviar sushi. It’s also worth noting that the sushi chef apprenticed for Chef Takashi Saito while living in Tokyo but, again, he’s white. According to dozens of diners, Chef Steve Johnson is just too white to make sushi.

Over the last several weeks, the uproar surrounding the restaurant grew so much that the Health Department was forced to get involved. Though Bushido Sushi passed a thorough health inspection, it was ordered to post a disclaimer warning customers that it is, in fact, run by a white dude.

“It’s good sushi… if you can call it sushi,” said Kenji Smith, a spokesperson for the health department. “But it’s run by a white dude. The people have a right to know.”

At publishing time, Bushido Sushi had shuttered its doors, and will reportedly reopen in three months as a Denny’s.


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