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If there were a reboot of Dante’s Inferno, the airport would be one of the circles of hell. Airports are worse when you are traveling during the holidays. Airports during the holidays are worse having to deal with the other people who are traveling during the holidays. Barstool Sports president Dave Portnoy found himself in his own personal inferno on Thursday.

At first, it looked like this would be a video about a crazy lady still wearing a mask in 2024. Then, the camera pans to the left.

Who puts their buddy on speaker like this? It’s crazy. Does he even hear me talkin’ about him? Just take it off speaker, put it in your phone. It’s basic human decency.

Let’s set aside that I’m not sure why El Pres is flying commercial when Rumble stock is going TO THE MOON. Shout out Chris Pavlovski. Shout out Tether. Shout out Steve Michalik.

The lack of self awareness it takes to have personal conversations on your speakerphone in public like that must be nice. To live blissfully unaware of your surroundings as if you are the only person in existence seems like a pleasant state to live your life in.

It’s all oldhead boomers, too. Youngbloods know that people who talk on the phone when they can send text messages are sociopaths.

And look, I get it. We all need something to do at the airport to pass the boredom. That’s why God created airport beers. Or buy yourself a pair of earbuds to listen to music or Instagram videos. Side note: people who watch viral videos in public with the sound on suck too.

If all else fails and you’ve determined a lack of consideration for everyone around you is the play, at least have an interesting conversation for the enjoyment of those around you. Stock tips, political gossip, spilling tea on who is cheating on who… give us something to work with. When people talk on speakerphone in public, it’s usually ten minutes of “So, how’s it going?” back and forth.

The only way to deal with people who have conversations on their speaker phone in public is equally public shaming. Thank you El Pres for bringing it back.

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Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn’t writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.

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