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The first round of the College Football Playoff delivered… blowouts

We got what we wanted, more College Football Playoff games. We evidently forgot to ask for more competitive match-ups in the first-round as the home teams had very little resistance from their visiting opponents.

The party started on Friday night with Notre Dame easily taking care of Indiana. They ended a fantastic Hoosiers season with a 27-17 win in what ended up being the closest – final score wise – of the first round games.

Penn State would then blow out SMU in Happy Valley 38-10 to kick off a Saturday of blowouts. Clemson was the only team of the first-round losers to score more than 20 points and put up any sort of fight. The Tigers still lost by 14 points to Texas, 38-24.

Then came Saturday night’s game, with a lot of Tennessee fans making the trip north to Columbus to witness what quickly turned into an embarrassing 42-17 ass kicking by Ohio State.

There will be a lot of complaints about the teams that made the 12 team playoff and some of those who didn’t make it being more deserving. The what-if games will roll the rest of the postseason and into next season I’m sure. If you didn’t like it there were a couple of entertaining NFL games on as well.

I’m not interested in any of the what-if games. The quarterfinal match-ups are set, and I’m rolling into the next round with a Penn State team that has a head coach who can’t win big games. That first round game against SMU was not a big game.

If I’m being honest, I don’t know whether the Fiesta Bowl against Boise State is either. That’s not to say that Penn State won’t find a way to lose that game, but a semifinal game against either Notre Dame or Georgia has big game written all over it.

I would have loved for an Ohio State loss at home to Tennessee to have made Saturday even better, but it wasn’t meant to be, and the Buckeyes are going up against Oregon in their quarterfinal game.

We’ll see if Ohio State is legit or not when the Rose Bowl goes down.

Deez-Nuts sentenced in plea deal

Earlier this year, a Green Bay, Wisconsin man named Deez-Nuts Kroll was arrested for a violent confrontation with his daughter and her boyfriend. He appeared to be intoxicated at the time of his arrest and wasn’t clothed when the police arrived.

Last week the court case against him came to a conclusion just in time for the holidays. Deez-Nuts, according to The Smoking Gun, took a plea deal. He pleaded no contest to disorderly conduct while in possession of a dangerous weapon.

He was subsequently found guilty of the second degree misdemeanor and the prosecutors dropped the misdemeanor battery charge. A happy ending for a man with a hilarious name.

Deez-Nuts was given a year’s probation, a $463 fine, and an order to maintain “absolute sobriety” in the plea deal.

In another touching twist, an earlier court filing reported that he had attended counseling sessions with his 19-year-old daughter.

That’s a turn I didn’t see this story taking. Deez-Nuts and his daughter coming together before Christmas is a beautiful moment for all involved.

Santa busted a car theft suspect

Let’s go to Alabama, where even Santa Claus has joined in on the fight against crime. Last weekend the jolly old saint helped bust a car theft suspect.

Deputies with the Jefferson County Sheriff’s Office received an alert for a stolen vehicle in the area while working a traffic safety checkpoint. They spotted the stolen Nissan Altima pulling into a church.

Paying a visit to a church after allegedly stealing a car is how you keep your universe centered. When officers attempted to stop the Altima, the driver took off into a nearby wooded area while his passenger surrendered.

Little did 18-year-old Derrion King know, but Santa Claus was in the area, and he apparently received an alert that someone on the naughty list was in the area. Retired deputy Larry Williams, who was dressed in a Santa suit, was volunteering at the church at the time.

He spotted King attempting to sneak out of the woods and blend in with the crowd at the church. He detained the suspect. According to KFOX 14, the suspect was arrested and charged with receiving property (1st Degree) with a $15,000 bond and attempting to elude a police officer with a $1,000 bond.

“We need all the help we can get. Thank you, Santa, for the assist! Even Santa has our back when it comes to fighting crime,” said Sheriff Mark Pettway.

You might think that you can run from the law, but you can’t run from Santa Claus.

Nothing says Merry Christmas like fighting at the gym

A gym in Brazil spread some holiday cheer recently in the form of a fight among gym goers. Unconventional, yes, but entertaining nonetheless.

From the translated caption on the video we learned that an aggressive reaction to a long wait to use a machine led to an argument which then turned physical.

Apparently, one of the women involved in the brawl decided to do another set and instead set the woman waiting off. There was pushing and shoving, punches and kicks thrown, and I’m going to assume at some point there was some hair pulling.

The best news of the entire exchange for those involved is that they probably didn’t have to do any cardio afterward. Unfortunately, when January rolls around, those wait times are only going to get longer.

Alphabet Convert

– Paul from St. Paul writes:

Seanie,

Yet another quality contribution from Australia.  They never disappoint when it comes to a variety of social mores.

Who knew?   You quit taking birth control, and dada!!!  You’re full-fledged card-carrying lesbian!  Celebration on blast!

If I had a $10 bill for every lesbian convert story in the past 15 years who made the switch coming out of a “toxic’ relationship with a male, I’d have a boat cruising the French Riviera. 

What a miracle!

SeanJo

Who knew indeed? All it takes to switch teams is ending a toxic relationship and hopping off birth control. A miracle like none other.

She’s not alone, according to the very reliable social media comment section. I personally look forward to more of these kinds of stories of self-discovery.

——–

That’s it for the final Sunday before Christmas. I hope everyone who celebrates has a great Christmas this year. Today we’ve got some of Instagram’s finest helping get those festivities started.

I’ll see you next week. The inbox is always open sean.joseph@outkick.com.

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