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Well, it happened. Despite all the years of warnings – all the stupid Trent the Turkey and the Thanksgiving Volcano memes from the US Consumer Product Safety Commission …

– someone still did the meme!

They fried their turkey in the garage – and not just any garage either – the garage of a $4 million, 11 bedroom, 9.5 bath, 9,378 square-foot mansion in Weston, Connecticut.

It’s hard to imagine a turkey could do all this:

Everyone self-evacuated after the fire started (all 40 of them), and there were no reported injuries.

However, after a 16-hour battle with the blaze, the fire department was unable to save the home.

‘Firefighters attempted an aggressive fire attack, however, their efforts were thwarted by dangerous fire conditions and structural collapse,’ the Weston volunteer fire department wrote in a release. ‘In addition, a vehicle drove over the water supply hose on Weston Road, damaging the line, which completely stopped the flow of water for several minutes.’

The fire department then posted this picture as a stark reminder to follow turkey fryer safety warnings:

You have to wonder what could possess a person to ignore all the warnings despite the years and years of repetitive droning about the dangers of turkey fires.

I’ll have William Shatner play us out with a dramatic reenactment of what must have been going through the Connecticut cook’s mind on Thursday:

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