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We interrupt coverage of Donald Trump nominating officials and the Left having meltdowns about those officials to bring you this breaking story out of Australia: Kangaroos beating the bejesus out of each other.
I don’t know what it is that is so damn funny about kangaroos fighting. I don’t know what it is about kangaroos that are so funny. Other than they hop around, they look weird, and anything popular in the glorified penal colony known as Australia is amusing to the rest of us. It’s also a socialism warning. But in this case, we’re just talking about two roos fighting. Until one puts the other through a metal wall.
No, seriously. Right through the wall.
I don’t know what set it off. I’m assuming a jill was involved. Which, if you googled like I just did, you would know a jill is a female kangaroo. Hoppy found out that Dr. Pouch has been shagging his old lady. So, Hoppy confronted Dr. Pouch about it. A brawl broke out, as is known to happen when you shag another mammal’s or marsupial’s mate.
Hoppy had enough. In a fit of rage, he put Dr. Pouch through a metal wall.
The video doesn’t say what happened to Dr. Pouch. Maybe the blow killed him. Maybe he played dead knowing it was the only way things with Hoppy were going to end.
The only thing missing was Hoppy catching his breath, wiping the blood off his lip, and wandering off as the sad walking away song from The Incredible Hulk played in the background.
Godspeed, Hoppy. One day, you’ll find love again.
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Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn’t writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.
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