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Even after a decisive election in which President-elect Donald Trump increased his support among nearly every demographic group, The New York Times is as busy as ever dividing Americans over race and sex. I’m convinced if it weren’t allowed to do that for a single day, the paper would shut down.

The Times this week ran the absurd headline, “Disillusioned by the Election, Some Black Women Are Deciding to Rest,” bolstering that thesis with serious investigative work into the mood of black Americans across the nation.

Just kidding. The Times simply interviewed a handful of DEI scammers and looked at TikTok, where the most psychotic Democrat women go to record and publicly share their mental breakdowns.

At the very start of the article is a quote from Cheri Hall, a “diversity, equity and inclusion consultant,” who told the paper she was “heartbroken” by Trump’s victory. The Times then described a narcissistic TikTok video Hall recently posted in which she hysterically declares her intent to socially withdraw and encourages other black women to do the same.

“She won’t allow herself to feel consumed by national politics, she said, and she instead plans to focus on her mental and physical health by exercising and no longer molding herself to please others,” is how the Times generously explained it. The video would be more accurately described as a self-important monologue about how a Democrat voter didn’t see the election results she’d hoped for — surely a victim of the media’s nonstop lies that Kamala Harris was popular — so she plans to alienate her neighbors.

“For the foreseeable future,” Hall says, “we are minding our black ass business.” She insists that going forward, “No one is invited to the cookout,” a slang expression that refers to the welcoming of non-blacks in predominantly black social spaces.

The Times also quoted Vernique Esther Ofili, identified as a social worker and therapist (of course). “Our feelings are hurt,” she said. “We get to decide how we respond.” The article said Ofili’s post-election emotional exhaustion has instilled in her “plans to rest,” which she intends to do by using an old sewing machine.

That’s not a joke. “In coming months, Ms. Ofili plans to rest by pursuing a personal goal,” the Times said. “To honor her grandmother who was a seamstress, she’ll finally use the sewing machine she was given seven years ago.”

As in every past presidential election of the 21st century, the overwhelming majority of black voters, especially black women, supported the Democrat nominee. But Kamala Harris got a lower share of black voters than Joe Biden in 2020. There are surely some black women voters who are taking the loss hard, just as there are some white women and gay men. But trust me, I know many black women. They’re doing just fine. They’re not learning to knit or discovering a newfound love for antiquing because Kamala doesn’t get to be president. They’re not withdrawing from social life.

This is simply an attempt by The New York Times to pass off the resentment of a few predictably unbalanced HR ladies as representative of some broadly felt racial conflict. That’s the Times doing what the Times likes to do — divide people.

Eddie Scarry is the D.C. columnist at The Federalist and author of “Liberal Misery: How the Hateful Left Sucks Joy Out of Everything and Everyone.”