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We did it, y’all! Team Screencaps (aka Kinsey’s Folly) ran 200 miles across the state of Kentucky this past weekend and raised more than $5,000 for victims of Hurricane Helene.

I know Joe covered the race extensively in Screencaps throughout the course of our adventure and I won’t drag it out, but I hope you’ll humor me for just a moment.

I had no idea what to expect when I agreed to do this race. I just knew it was going to be me and 11 Screencaps readers, pushing our bodies to their absolute limit, exhausted and sweaty, in a van for 30+ hours. And, yes, that’s exactly what it was.

But it was more than that, too. It was, surprisingly, A LOT of fun.

For my part, I ran a total of 18 miles. And over the course of our 32-hour journey, I slept maybe an hour and half (shoutout to Anderson County High School for letting us use their showers and lay some sleeping bags on their gym floor at 1:30 in the morning).

There is no way I should have been physically able to do that. But being surrounded by great people, incredible athletes and all the positivity in the world will give you more energy than any packaged pre-workout on the market. It was truly a special experience.

So at the risk of sounding cheesy, thank you to Joe for sponsoring, to Indy Daryl for organizing, to my team for being amazing and — most of all — to all the readers who came together to donate to the people suffering across the Southeast in the wake of Hurricane Helene. 

That’s what this community is about.

You’ll drink to that? Good. Pour one up. It’s Nightcaps time!

TikToker Thought She Found A Dead Body

Since it’s officially Spooky Season, let’s lead Nightcaps with a very spooky story: A woman in Columbus, Ohio, has become TikTok-famous after she thought she found evidence of a murder buried in her backyard.

Preparing to install a fence in her backyard, Katie Santry (and whoever was helping her… that bit is unclear) was digging a hole in the dirt when she ran across a rolled up carpet. She had already been experiencing some strange and potentially paranormal happenings in the sun room facing that backyard, so some viewers became convinced she had just uncovered a dead body.

And, honestly, that doesn’t seem like a leap to me. What other reason would someone have for burying a rolled up carpet?! The previous homeowner must have murdered someone, wrapped up their remains and threw them into a how into the backyard — never to be found again.

Until now!

After some urging from followers, Katie decided to call the police to investigate.

Now, I don’t know how much time (if any) you spend on TikTok. But when I tell you everyone on that app is an amateur detective, I am not kidding. Over the past couple of years, I’ve watched these social media sleuths attempt to solve everything from the University of Idaho murders to Gabby Petito and even the missing Titanic submarine.

So needless to say, when Katie presented this backyard rug mystery, TikTokers were absolutely salivating for updates. And that’s why she’s raked up more than 305 million views (and counting) since that first video.

After an initial visit from police, Katie then got a call that they would be sending homicide detectives and cadaver dogs to excavate the site.

Reportedly, BOTH cadaver dogs marked, meaning they picked up the scent of human remains. But after police collected and tested portions of the rug, they determined that the area tested negative for both human and animal remains.

An officer said it is common when homes are built for people to bury items instead of moving them “to save effort.” Now, maybe I’m crazy, but doesn’t it seem like a whole lot more effort to dig a three foot by sixth foot hole in the ground than it does to haul something off to a dumpster?

Also, were BOTH dogs having a bad day? Police had an explanation for that, too: It is also possible someone had suffered something as small as a nosebleed years ago that the dogs picked up on, according to an officer.

And if a nosebleed or a scraped knee from years ago is enough to throw off a cadaver dog, doesn’t that essentially render cadaver dogs pretty useless?

I have SO MANY QUESTIONS.

What I do know, though, is that our girl Katie Santy is going to try to extend her 15 minutes of fame as long as she possibly can.

Santry has since started a line of merchandise with T-shirts, hoodies and hats that say, “What’s in the rug?” I’m not sure that slogan is going to catch on quite like “Hawk Tuah,” Katie, but best of luck to you.

Dua Lipa Ruins Diet Coke

Here’s another TikTok mystery for you: What on earth is Dua Lipa doing to her Diet Coke?

I’m fairly certain I’ve professed my love for Diet Coke on this website before. That cold, crispy nectar of the gods is a weakness for me, and I don’t apologize for it. And before anyone wants to lecture me about the dangers of aspartame, save it. You could get hit by a bus tomorrow, and those artificial sweeteners are going to be the least of your worries.

Anyway, I’m not alone. Dua Lipa loves her Diet Cokes as well. She just likes to enjoy hers, well, a little differently.

Nope, you weren’t hallucinating. That’s diet coke with a splash of pickle and jalapeño juice. And I just have one question…

WHY?

This actually reminds me of the time that Diet Coke shaded me on Twitter for insulting their new line of fruit drinks.

By the way, those Diet Coke fruit sodas were discontinued pretty quickly, so APPARENTLY there weren’t as many adventurous taste buds out there as the Coca-Cola Company anticipated. Once again lending credence to the age-old words of wisdom: If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

And that’s why we should go back to the original Coke recipe. Just cocaine and caffeine, baby!

I digress. Back to Dua Lipa’s TikTok… What do we know about TikTokers (other than the fact that they like to solve murders)? They love a good trend. So now everyone is trying the spicy pickled Diet Coke.

Alright, fine. Texting my husband now to pick up jalapeños on his way home from work.

I’ll report back next week.

Mormon Wives Love Dirty Sodas

By the way, Dua Lipa isn’t the only person doing weird things to soda on social media. This has been a trend ever since the release of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives on Hulu. Because Mormons aren’t supposed to drink alcohol or consume drugs, apparently Mormon women get their kicks from assorted “mocktails” and soda concoctions.

DISCLAIMER: Please note this is coming from a silly TV series and should not be taken as absolute gospel when it comes to the actual doctrine of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Anyway, here’s an example.

The Mormon wives call them “dirty sodas,” and they’re are typically made up of a base carbonated beverage infused with various flavors from syrup and creams and poured over crushed ice.

Side note: This may be an unpopular opinion, but crushed ice is the absolute worst. I know, I know… Some people live for that “Sonic ice,” but those people are misguided. Why would you specifically choose tiny ice that is going to melt faster and water down your drink? Do better.

I was under the impression, though, that caffeine is frowned upon in the LDS church, so I was confused about the dirty soda thing. 

But I did some research (I Googled), and I learned this, via the Salt Lake Tribune: “There is no general church proscription against faithful members consuming caffeinated sodas. Yes, the Word of Wisdom forbids “hot drinks.” Yes, church leaders have stated that means swearing off coffee or tea.”

So God is fine with Diet Coke, just not coffee.

I don’t know, guys, this all sounds confusing and not really worth it.

Just pour some whiskey in your gas station Big Gulp and don’t tell anyone inside the church. At least, that’s what the Mormons I went to grad school with always did.

They also taught me a fun riddle: 

Why should you always invite two Mormons to go fishing? Because if you only invite one, he’ll drink all your beer.

Speaking of things that taste weird…

Readers Weigh In On Most Bizarre Beers:

Last week, I wrote about a mustard beer at the Texas State Fair and asked y’all what is the strangest beer you’ve ever tasted. 

Gen X Warren: Pizza beer, it was bizarre. Beer with oregano and other spices, etc. Worth trying once during my craft beer era. (Switched back to light beer and lost 15 lbs!)

Otis (Usually) In Mobile: So at Galveston Island Brewery they have a dill pickle beer. I tasted it and everyone reading this has an idea of what it tastes like, and you are right. Now I LOVE drinking pickle juice right out of the jar, and I love a good beer, but I do not need them together. I like single malt and peanut butter…..you get the idea. Yeah, only in Galveston I think. It’s certainly time to get out of this place.

Sherry in Tennessee: You have to try the Shock Top Twisted Pretzel. I said there’s no way this is going to be drinkable. I was wrong.

Boring Norm: “Genny” Cream Ale is the worst. It is what all the old men in western New York sit around drinking while talking about the weather, the war or why Canadians always ask their money to be treated on par with real dollars. They still use the same label from the ’50s, and most of this crap tastes like it was brewed back then as well. In brewing, it reuses the original “wort” instead of fresh sugars, making for a recycled taste, not in a good way.

If you want a good beverage from WNY, try some loganberry. Tasty stuff.

Boring Norm says steer clear.

Desert Dan: Banana bread beer. I first tried it about 10 years ago and thought it was so strange, but very good. I’ve since been informed by beer snobs that “banana bread beer” is just fancy branding for a Hefeweizen, but I recommend it nonetheless.

Man Gets Covered In Grease Breaking Into Restaurant

A video of a Houston man covered in grease has recently gone viral on TikTok following a failed break-in attempt at the Red Lion Pub. Jose Galvan, 43, had recently been fired from the restaurant and — for some mysterious reason — was trying to break in.

He reportedly tried to sneak in through the grease vent in the roof, but he got stuck. Employees didn’t find him until the next day.

And he looked like this:

You know those commercials where wildlife rescue folks are washing baby ducks with Dawn dish soap? That’s what had to happen here, too. And the Houston police department clearly buys their dish soap in bulk like P. Diddy buys his baby oil.

READ: Diddy’s Lawyer Makes Wild Claim That Costco Could Be To Blame For All The Baby Oil

Which leads me to ask the obvious question: Does this sort of thing happen so often that police departments just keep industrial-sized Dawn on hand just in case?

Look, I’ve worked in my fair share of restaurants. I didn’t even want to be there when I was getting paid — let alone when I was no longer an employee. So I’d like an explanation as to why this man wanted back in that kitchen so badly.

One More Thing

Back in June, my 85-year-old grandpa was out baling hay on our family farm when he suffered a terrible accident. He hopped off the tractor to cut the baling wire, but the tractor was still in gear. He fell down, and the tractor ran him over.

He was airlifted to a hospital (an hour away) with a shattered pelvis, broken ribs and extensive organ damage. We didn’t know if he’d make it.

This weekend — 113 days later — he was released from the medical facility. For his first stop, he went to his favorite restaurant, and he walked in on his own.

Thanks to everyone for the prayers and the positivity over these past few months. Miracles do happen.

Now go kick this week’s ass.

OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m.

Follow me on X / Twitter at @TheAmberHarding or email me at Amber.Harding@OutKick.com.