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It’s easy to tell that Tuesday night’s vice presidential debate was a disaster for Tim Walz, because of how hard the media is working to pretend it wasn’t. Politico might be the best representation of the desperate left-wing media effort to defend Walz while lobbing absurd criticisms towards JD Vance.

To the overwhelming majority of objective observers, Vance came across as highly prepared, eloquent and in command of a wide variety of issues. Walz, meanwhile, looked like a terrified deer in the headlights. His answer to a question about yet another obvious lie about his background was one of the worst answers in major debate history.

READ: Tim Walz Savagely Roasted For Awful Debate Performance

Walz looked uncomfortable, unprepared and, well, weird. Wide-eyed and almost hyper, he was off-putting and tough to watch. Unless you’re Politico, of course.

Politico Embarrasses Itself With Fawning Praise For Tim Walz, Ridiculous Criticism For JD Vance

Know any adult human males in your life with a beard? Have one yourself? Well does Politico have news for you! You’re “conveying aggression” to women. With a beard. Seriously.

“Our appearance is fundamental to our body language,” a body language “expert” said in a new Politico article. “And research indicates that voters see beards as (surprise, surprise) more masculine. That can be positive to some, reading as strength and competence. But to others, especially women, it can be negative, conveying aggression and opposition to feminist ideals.”

Having a beard is “opposition to feminist ideals.” You just can’t make it up when it comes to the desperate Democratic media. And if you think that’s bad, just wait until you see what they said about Walz’s bizarre, wild-eyed expression.

“When Walz felt especially passionate about something, he’d open his eyes wide as saucers,” the article reads. “Eye-popping can sometimes be a sign of surprise, but for Walz, it simply revealed his emotional intensity…The orbicularis oculi muscle, working in concert with the corrugator and frontalis muscles, contract to raise the eyebrows — a dynamic and emphatic facial motion that grabbed the viewer’s attention. Early humans would have made such facial gestures to communicate strong emotions, like ‘danger is close.’ For Walz, it gave extra weight to his feelings and held our gaze.”

It’s expected that the left-wing media will do whatever necessary to protect its ideological partners. But this takes the cake. Walz objectively looked weird, confused, and concerned about his atrocious performance. It’s reality denial to suggest otherwise. But that’s what Politico’s “expert” did. Bears are aggression, confused extremism is intense and meaningful. Insanity.

But then again, insanity is what Walz’s media allies do best.