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LONDON — In a surprise move today, Elon Musk purchased the entirety of the United Kingdom in order to allow citizens to again have the freedom of speech they once enjoyed.

“How much is it?” asked Musk in a post on X, after user ‘Tom_Bomb_420’ had posted that Musk should consider purchasing the former empire. Musk then followed up with a post of a thinking emoji, a sure sign that the billionaire was seriously weighing the pros and cons of purchasing the United Kingdom.

Though several British politicians insisted that one could not simply purchase their country, Musk simply responded, “LOL just did.”

While Musk reportedly paid a hefty sum for the islands, he felt the purchase justified in order to safeguard the sharing of dank memes. “Every man, woman and child deserves the opportunity to share memes,” explained Musk. “The irony of a South African buying the U.K. has a delicious irony for sure – but trust me, it’s all about the memes, baby.”

At publishing time, Elon Musk had reportedly begun considering buying America after hearing the Democratic ticket’s position on the First Amendment.

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