We support our Publishers and Content Creators. You can view this story on their website by CLICKING HERE.

U.S. — A combination of archaeological evidence and textual analysis has led many Bible scholars to believe King David wrote Psalm 22 after stepping on a plastic Lego brick.

“Also, it just makes sense,” argued Dr. Dorm Lingish, a professor in the Department of Biblical Studies at the Tel Aviv University in Israel. “I don’t think anything is more painful than stepping on a Lego brick”

“Except maybe a crucifixion.”

This exciting new context is thanks in part to a new reading of Psalm 22:8, which reads, “Turn him over to the LORD; let Him save him[…]” For years it has been understood figuratively as “to hand over,” or “deliver unto” but a new analysis of the Hebrew text has led many scholars to apply a literal interpretation.

Harvard Professor of Ancient Hebrew Literature Dr. Jeffers Beauregard published a paper based on new evidence uncovered in the Middle East.

“This is not figurative language,” Dr. Beauregard argues. “It means literally ‘to turn over,’ presumably to reveal the Lego brick that had pierced his foot, a reading that is also consistent with verse 16.”

Recent discoveries by UCLA Professor of Archeology Dr. Andy Palm, the leading expert on ancient Lego sets, corroborate this assertion.

“Not only was King David contemporary with The LEGO Group, but he likely owned several Lego builds from the Exodus sets that Josephus wrote about,” Dr. Palm said. “It was a popular way for parents to teach their kids Biblical stories back then.”

At publishing time, scholars had also surmised that Absolom’s resentment of David and eventual attempt to steal the throne from him was a result of David taking away his Legos as a child.

Watch how a D.E.I. consultant magically turns a video game into… well, something else entirely.


Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more uplifting DEI videos!