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If you’re cruising the pews for a husband or wife, there are some helpful tricks to spotting a great future spouse. Here are nine things to look for at Church this Sunday:

  1. Has a worn Bible – Excuse me, but I believe your holiness is showing.

  2. Sings all the words to classic hymns even with eyes closed – Hubba-hubba!

  3. Volunteers for VBS – Is it getting hot in here? It feels hot all of a sudden.

  4. Rolls eyes when worship leader starts playing Hillsong – Yowza!

  5. Turns to book of Hezekiah without even looking at the table of contents – Be still, my beating heart.

  6. WWJD bracelet – like a beacon saying, “come, enjoy fifty years of wedded bliss.”

  7. Sighs dreamily and says, “if only I could find a godly spouse to raise many children with.” – GO GET A RING!!

  8. Has completed Awana vest – the foundation on which so many years of happy marriage are built.

  9. Says, “Hey, check out this funny Babylon Bee headline.” – This is the one!!

Find these at Church next week and a lifetime of loving matrimony could be all yours!

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*Fun not guaranteed


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