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NASHVILLE, TN — Eyewitnesses at a local Waffle House said the pancake diner was rocked with cheers, whistles, and a few shouts after a waitress revealed the combatants in this weekend’s fight card — Hank the Hobo vs. Crackhead Steve.

Sources said that the fight had been in the works for quite some time, ever since the pair fought each other last March in a 2-hour bout that ended in a close win for Hank the Hobo after Crackhead Steve started to experience symptoms of withdrawal.

Waffle House patrons said the restaurant would probably be packed with eager fans, while management expected to have to hire some extra security to make sure the violence remains contained.

“Yeah, man, this brawl is gonna be fire!” said Billy Smuckers, a WWE aficionado and Waffle House regular. “I saw these boys going at it a while ago, and they’re going to eat this whole place up!”

An early straw poll of customers seemed to favor Hank the Hobo, though Crackhead Steve was said to be in the best condition of his career.

“Nothing like pounding a few pancakes while watching a good fight on the floor a few feet away from you,” Smuckers added.

At publishing time, the betting odds remained tight, shifting from 4:5 in favor of Hank the Hobo to 6:5 in favor of Crackhead Steve due to several Steve fans having expressed their intention to “bring in a few rocks for the big guy.”

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