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There is a hobby horser on the TikToks who is big mad none of you are taking her hobby horsing seriously. Not just her hobby horsing, but her competitive hobby horsing. And I know what many of you are thinking: “Hey Brodigan, when you say hobby horse … you mean the horse’s head on a stick that three-year-olds play with, right?”

I promise as we take this journey together, I am going to say neigh to any horse puns. Okay, just that one.

Hobby horsing allows vegans to take part in “dressage” – a form of horse riding performed in exhibitions and competitions—without riding an actual horse, which would be a no-no since being vegan prevents them from doing or liking anything normal. Here is an example of what a vegan horse riding competition from Finland looks like.

I had the same reaction watching this video as you and @M1NESAPINT on X-Twitter did. There are grown adults expecting to be taken seriously while riding a hobby horse, and nary a locker to shove them in or a toilet to introduce to their face to anywhere to be found. If you have an instinct to eat a hamburger or drink a glass of milk in front of them, you aren’t alone. Israel and Palestine can be united, if just for twenty-seven seconds, to laugh at these silly people.

Anna on TikTok takes her horseriding very, VERY seriously. “‘Hobbyhorsing is not a sport, it’s easy and everyone can do that’ . . . Oh yeah?,” she asks.

Then — and this was meant for people watching to feel bad about mocking hobby horsers and/or to start taking them seriously — Anna displays the mental, physical, and emotional anguish that comes with hobby horsing.

“This is me after my dressage routine… I was passing out, couldn’t breathe, almost throwing up, dizzy, shaking, whole body burning in pain…”

At least when Chavo Guerrero Jr. pranced around with Pepe in the late 90s, he was in on the joke. That’s an oldhead reference, zoomers. Google it.

I would give anything to go back to a few hours ago, to a time I did not know “hobby horsing” was a competitive thing. Worse? it’ll no doubt be an Olympic event in four years.

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Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn’t writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.

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“Curvy” TikTok Model Tries to Ride a Horse | Louder With Crowderyoutu.be