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WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrats have called for the removal of a statue of anti-apartheid activist and freedom fighter Nelson Mandela after learning the man was also a convicted felon.

Calls for the removal grew louder after many noted the eerie similarity to Donald Trump, who is also a convicted felon.

“We should never give convicted felons a place of honor in the seat of holy democracy,” said Senator Chuck Schumer in a statement. “Nelson Mandela was imprisoned by his own government, which means he was clearly a bad guy who totally deserved it. Tear this dangerous statue down immediately!”

Mandela, who was captured and imprisoned by his political opposition in cooperation with the CIA, was incarcerated for 27 years before being elected to the presidency and ending South African apartheid, has been viewed as a hero by many Democrats. “That was before we found out he was a dirty, evil convicted felon,” proclaimed Congresswoman AOC to reporters. “Felons are always evil. Like convicted felon Trump, who is a convicted felon and therefore bad. Did I mention he was a convicted felon?”

At publishing time, Democrats had also called for the removal of the Washington Monument after discovering he had several warrants out for his arrest issued by King George.

We asked Trump to narrate 7 more famous historic battles, and the result was tremendous and magnificent. Everyone says so.


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