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Reminder for all you Christians who started a one-year Bible reading plan in January: it might be time to start that thing. The good news is that if you read half of the entire Bible today, you’ll be completely caught up!

That shouldn’t be hard! That’s only, like, 21 books of the Bible! Just blow through Song of Solomon or maybe Isaiah this evening, and BOOM! You’ll be back on track! 

Of course, you don’t have to put too much pressure on yourself. You could easily start it tomorrow. Just add a couple of pages and you’re good to go.

Or, you could break it up into bite-sized chunks by reading Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy, Joshua, Judges, Ruth, 1 Samuel, and 2 Samuel tonight, and reading 1 Kings, 1 Kings, 1 Chronicles, 2 Chronicles, Ezra, Nehemiah, Esther, Job, Psalms, Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, Song of Solomon, and Isaiah tomorrow. You should be able to do that—and then you’ll be back on track to keeping the promise you made to God on January 1st! Good for you! 

Or better yet, just relax and pick up your Bible and read one or two chapters tonight. That’s better than nothing.

Babylon Bee subscriber Mayday Malone contributed to this report. If you want to get involved with the staff writers at The Babylon Bee, check out our membership options here!

Judges at a school spelling bee are stumped and infuriated when a child dares to ask them for a definition of the word “woman.”

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