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Well, [latest Marvel movie] is out, and if there’s something we can say about it, it’s that it’s a movie where things happen, heroes punch bad guys, and sometimes there are jokes.

[Hero] went on a journey of self-discovery in [latest Marvel movie]. [Hero] faced a challenge unlike anything [hero] had faced before, with unexpected plot twists, betrayals, and sudden changes of fortune along the way. At least one intimidating CGI foe was fought. Jokes were told as [hero] struggled to overcome [bad guy], including several pop culture references that made us say, “Hey, I understand that reference.” And then, we all clapped. But, in the end, [hero] went through a dark night of the soul moment and drew on the lessons [hero] had learned throughout the film to overcome [bad guy].

Especially effective was the scene in which [hero] and [bad guy] faced off, each holding out their hands as some sort of electrical energy shot out and the battling currents pushed against each other as the two combatants strained mightily. We recognized [other Marvel hero] and [other other Marvel hero], who made brief appearances to assist [hero]. They also said their signature catchphrases and made a reference to something that happened in [previous Marvel movie]. We all clapped.

That’s not to say the plot was perfect. It could be confusing. For instance, a few things didn’t make sense unless you had seen [Marvel show on Disney+] and [other Marvel movie]. But as long as you are caught up on all [running Marvel movie count] Marvel movies, you shouldn’t have any trouble following along.

Plus, it was maybe a little too long at [runtime], but we were excited that the extra runtime was used to represent [underrepresented minority or LGBTQ group] throughout [latest Marvel movie]. Although [other underrepresented minority or LGBTQ group] still hasn’t been given the representation they deserve in the Marvel universe, and we hope Marvel corrects this in [next Marvel movie].

And – spoiler alert – after the credits of [latest Marvel movie], a surprise character from [other Marvel movie] appeared, teasing us to go watch [next Marvel movie].

We all clapped.

Final score: 3/5 stars, signifying we enjoyed [latest Marvel movie] but probably will rewatch it in a year or two and think, “I don’t remember a single thing that happened in this movie.”

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