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THE ARK—God has promised to flood the Earth due to mankind’s wickedness and has tasked Noah with building an ark and taking with him a pair of each kind of animal to preserve their offspring. Unfortunately, all of the animals selected ended up being males as Noah is not a biologist. 

“Let’s see here…every kind of clean animal, unclean animal, and bird of the air. Looks like we got ’em all!” exclaimed Noah surveying all the animals on board. “We’re ready to be sealed up and not a moment too late—the water is rising fast!”

According to members of his family, just as Noah was sitting down and getting settled, the Lord asked Noah why the ark was full of only male animals and not male and female pairs of each kind. “Well, the funny thing is, God, I’m not really what you might call a biologist so I have no way of knowing if I grabbed a male or female.”

“I just took a wild guess and did my best in this context. Without any special, official training it was impossible to tell them apart.” continued Noah. “So not a single female on board, huh? Honestly, I’m not even sure how I managed to do that. My bad?”

At publishing time, the Lord said his heart was grieved and that he regretted making human beings on the earth.

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